Are you living with Integrity or just being honest?

I often think of phrases that are overused in our common vernacular and how they make us feel. Words like "like," "circle back," "triggered," "literally," "really," "to be honest," " authentic self," and so many others are used so frequently we often forget their meaning and in that lose their effect on us. We've all been there, saying the same word over and over again, it starts to feel jumbled in our brains, the meaning lost to the ether. Why do we use these phrases so often? Is it because it makes us seem trendy? Is it because we think it makes us seem more intelligent? Or is it just another phenotype of slang language that should be written in the urban dictionary?

As I understand it, it is our core values are what drive our behaviors. Don't get me started on the implications of the overuse of "authentic" I've recently observed. However, I would like to highlight another word that I feel is overused and frequently misunderstood.

• INTEGRITY

If asked, most of us would say we know that the term integrity means. But if pushed further to give that definition we would probably be a bit off target. The majority of us would believe that integrity means "doing the right thing" or "being a good person." colloquially this is true, but the definition of integrity goes much deeper than that.

• "Give me a word, any word, and I show you that the root of that word is Greek."

And despite what my Greek heritage—and My Big Fat Greek Wedding—would have me believe, the word integrity isn't actually Greek. Its direct roots are Latin

integritās — meaning wholeness, completeness, soundness, uprightness, or blamelessness

integer — meaning whole, complete, untouched, unimpaired, sound

We use the word “integrity” all the time, but perhaps we've reduced it to simply “being honest” or “doing the right thing.” What if integrity is something much deeper? What if it is about becoming whole—where what we believe, what we say, and what we do are all aligned?

• Integrity and Core Values

Core values are what we believe at our very essence. Integrity is the alignment between those beliefs and the way we live.

Integrity is more about ALIGNMENT of our actions to our core values, than it is outward HONESTY. Yes, we MUST be honest with ourselves, However, we can be honest without having INTEGRITY.

Consider this scenario:

Imagine a friend asks:

“Did you eat the last piece of cake?”

You say:

“Yes, I did.”

That's honesty.

But if you have a core value of "truth" and had promised your child they could have the last piece, ate it anyway, and then admitted it when asked—you were honest after the fact, but your behavior may not have demonstrated congruency with your core value. You did not exhibit integrity.

Ask yourself : Are my actions consistent with my core values I hold?

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• What does this mean for us?

We need to have a strong understanding of our own core values and strive to align our life's actions with them. That is true integrity.

When our actions are aligned with our core values, something powerful happens—we feel at peace with ourselves. Our choices feel right, our hearts feel lighter, and we experience a deeper sense of happiness, fulfillment and connection.

Think about how empowering it is to realize that, no matter what is happening around you, you can always choose your response through the lens of your own core values. When your actions are based in what you truly believe, you don't have to question whether you are compromising your integrity.

Even more importantly, you don't have to allow someone else's values to dictate your own. You can respect another person's beliefs while remaining firmly rooted in yours.

Integrity is knowing what you stand for—and having the courage to live accordingly.

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